A little about me, I was raised Jehovah’s Witness by a family that was considered strict even by JW standards. My parents expected dating to be serious and for the purpose of marriage. I wasn’t allowed to date until the age of 18 when I disappeared. The expectation that one would be able to get marriage right the first time with no experience is like expecting someone to walk up too the plate in the last inning of the last game of the World Series and hit a home run while never having swung a bat before in your life, or at least that is what it feels like to me in retrospect, as I mentioned they were strict…
After my first colossal fuck up with my fiance’ I realized that while trying to find a woman that was the opposite of my mother I had attracted to myself my mother with short blonde hair in start of long dark hair. I realized that I knew literally nothing about these evil insane creatures and I would NEVER be in an exclusive relationship with one again. I needed an enriched environment in which I could study women. So I became a male stripper because I am a fast learner. I was never allowed to dance so I was very nervous when I auditioned I had never danced before because of my upbringing but I was hired on the spot. I literally learned to dance taking my clothes off on stage in front of women.
I danced for about 2 years and I observed women during that time. People will tell you that a club is not a good place to observe women but I have found it pretty much a predictive model for all women that I have met in my life. I would like to meet a woman that doesn’t think like a woman but I haven’t been that fortunate.
To say I was a good dancer would be an understatement. To this day I am an awesome dancer, I used to be a ringer for this black AM radio station, SHUT THE DO’ with Darnell. At the peak of my career I was hired to dance at the emerald queen casino for a Jay-Z concert. I was made a feature performer and my lap dances were better than most that one can get from a woman. I know because I have had a lot of lap dances from women, they actually influenced my style a lot.
I recently saw this movie, Magic Mike, and it reminded me of the experiences that I had, the stigma that women put on you if you are a male stripper. It was frustrating for me to watch how women make choices, women are more interested in competing with one another than they are in being in relationship. The ugliest brother in the club would make a minimum of $600 a night, easily, no matter how greasy his jerry curl was or how badly his teeth had rotted away. It wasn’t like we had mainly black women in the club either, but they think in terms of stigma. They think all of the other girls want the big black dick so they want the big black dick, and they would buy lap dances from them when they couldn’t even dance, while I made a maximum of $300 a night no matter how hard I busted my ass. I wanted to break into acting or professional dancing or anything but I couldn’t get any support. Women would fuck me but they wouldn’t support me and they didn’t trust me.
I had to stop dancing because I was beginning to hate women. They couldn’t make decisions correctly and I am not allowed to smack them around a little bit. I started hating stripping. It wasn’t fun anymore and I had nothing else to learn from it, the enriched environment had been exhausted after only two years. I remember Mark tried to get me to come back to dancing and I got up on stage and I started moving and I looked out at the audience and then I stopped and my head drooped and I just walked off the stage and out the door and I never came back.
My study of women continued with a 5 year bouncing career, most of it at a Samoan night club in Seatac that is now a casino. It had a 900 capacity, two floors. I got to study women in a slightly different environment and what I learned confirmed what I had seen thus far. That was all over 10 years ago and I have continued learning in every relationship I have. People think that it is not possible to understand women, women think it is not possible to understand women, they are both wrong.
Now that I know how women think I will never get into an exclusive relationship with one. It just isn’t worth it.
Oh, yeah, one more thing. My stage name was Sweetness.